Bismillah ir Rahman ir Raheem.
So much has been happening in my life lately. So many OVERWHELMING changes. I’ve rarely had the time to take stock.
So here I am.
I’ve noticed that life comes and goes in cycles. Good stuff. Bad stuff. Good days. Bad days.
Currently I’ve not had much success in the screenwriting/film-making department.
But I’ve been through long fallow periods before. I have hope.
This is a profound change for me. Choosing hope over despair.
It’s something I learned from Brene Brown. To paraphrase, if you numb pain, you also numb joy and hope. So I’ve decided to let both in and give them dinner and dessert.
So who is hope?
Hope is the good stuff. Makes whites whiter and colors brighter. Hope is a daring emotion. It takes courage to feel hope.
Because we all have that nagging voice in our heads. “Take all this joy down a notch. It’s not meant for you.”
How freaking disrespectful. Of course, it’s meant for me. Why else would I be feeling it?
So I’ve decided that I’m going to try pretty much everything and see what happens. No harm, no foul. And lots of hope. It’s a beautiful emotion and I want more of it. And oddly enough, that’s in my hands.
Who then is disappointment?
But of course, there will be disappointment. That hurts like a dentist’s appointment. Nothing will soften that blow. Except the memory of hope. And God.
Say it with me – nothing.
Put down that bottle. Put down that chocolate cake. No. Get away from that hot guy or girl.
It’s real. It’s here.
But it’ll go away. And then we’ll pick ourselves up and get back to work.
Notice I didn’t use a conditional sentence. I hate scolding. And being scolded. I know you’re a screenwriter. As am I. We hurt very deeply very often but we always get back up in the end. I have no doubt. Thank God!
Life comes and goes. Joy comes and goes. This is one of the great trials of this world. A friend once told that the good thing about bad things are that they end. And the bad thing about good things is that they too end.
Maybe this is why I believe in God. He never really goes away, no matter what I do. He’s always there to talk to.
Here’s another tidbit from the Internet that gives me hope.
Don’t be fooled by life’s outcomes.
I’ve spent so long thinking I was a screw-up because goshdarn it, I just happen to be at the wrong place at the wrong time. But none of it was really my fault. Nope. None of it.
Ultimately it’s all dumb luck. I don’t believe in luck. I believe in fate. So it’s all God’s grace.
Maybe one day, He’ll smile on me too. That’ll be a great day.
Till then, I’m going to hope. It doesn’t hurt. It heals.
This has been another joy-coated pain missive from your very own….
Happy (and Hopeful) Muslimah