Tag Archives: love

10 Qualities of Great Film: Part 1

Screenwriting, , , ,

Bismillah ir Rahman ir Raheem.

I hope everyone’s having an amazing new year. I hope you had a great 2014 – mine was difficult but kinda beautiful in an unexpected way.

Looking back on my year, I’ve surfaced a few regrets (haven’t we all?) I’ve been choosing projects that I think people want to see rather than stuff that’ll light me on fire. Yes, thinking about the consumer is important. That said, scripts are like relationships – you really need to feel true love for it to work in the long-term. And that means looking for something substantial past that first flush of romance. It helps to get intentional, I think, with what you want out of life and what kind of family you’d like to have.

Yes, I’m very much still in the ‘beating metaphors to death’ business.

Replace the word ‘family’ with career and you have a good philosophy of screenwriting.

So here I am refining my previous ad-hoc rather ill-conceived list of qualities of great film. 

Another thing I’d rather not do this year – write useless blog posts. I know when what I’m putting out isn’t particularly useful. I’m going to try and eliminate that. It wastes both my time and yours.

Don’t you just hate when you receive emails from people who are trying to sell you things? I want to receive emails because someone loves me and is thinking of me. It sorta makes me sad.

I love you guys, so consider this the first of God willing many presents.

  1. People being awesome.
  2. People being emotionally horrific.

My example for both of the above is Frances Ha.

This movie was excruciating to watch. Mainly because I’ve been there. No, not ‘poor’, but depending on the kindness of others and not getting it. Getting instead an odd sort of cruelty, an everyday but excruciating sort of torture, that you can’t really put your finger, that no one will go to jail for, but you know is a crime.

And who was awesome in all of this? Frances was awesome. Despite her pain and humiliation, she still danced down the street to ’80s music. She still held onto what made her unique.

And [SPOILER ALERT] – much like me, one day, she just got it. She figured what she had to do to survive. It takes a while, this adulthood crap, but it ain’t so bad once you get there.

I love movies that document that everyday inhumanity and everyday awesomeness. They are very often very uncomfortable to watch. But I love them.

3. Joy

4. Despair

This is not just about the everyday or the ‘micro’. Sometimes this can be about the macro – something larger scale that encompasses a town, village, a city, a country – politics, etc. A case in point being Billy Elliot.

Billy Elliot danced with joy, exasperation, frustration, guilt. He danced whatever he was feeling. And his family felt angry and sad because of the political situation and the loss of his mother.

Both joy and despair occurred in equal amounts in this movie. 

There’s a lot about the human condition that seems dichotomous to me. To know joy, you have to journey through despair. To experience and truly appreciate comfort, you must know pain. To love, you must know what loneliness, hatred and non-acceptance is.

Which leads me to the next thing I love:

5. Cyborg movies.

I don’t mean movies about cyborgs.

Courtesy Victor Habbick at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I mean movies that inhabit the cracks between categories, that defy easy categorization – something I know Hollywood loves, but I frankly do not. Is it a comedy or a drama? Is it about one man or about the world? Is it about a family or America?

Examples – Obvious Child.

Comedy? Drama? It certainly wasn’t always funny.

Michael Clayton.

Thriller? Drama? Is it about Michael Clayton or is it about the world that created Michael Clayton?

Watch this space because I’m going to keep talking.

Next up: Structure. Weirdness used to explore the quotidian. Honesty/authenticity.

The Emotions of Screenwriting: Anxiety

Islam, life, Screenwriting, , , , ,

Bismillah ir Rahman ir Raheem

Assalam alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatahu!

I’ve been putting off posting this because this is markedly more vulnerable than I usually am. And then I figured – what the heck?

There are many different kinds of pain in the world, but my particular brand is anxiety.

Anxiety flowers in my chest like a firework, spiking every nerve in my upper body. Anxiety immobilizes my brain and my legs because even the slightest movement, even the slightest thought, will let the predator know I’m here. Anxiety makes me feel like a toothless herbivore in the brush waiting to be hunted. Anxiety builds in the sides of my cheeks – as if screaming would help me. Anxiety cancels out my complexity, the strength that hides underneath my vulnerability.

I used to be crippled by these feelings. Like literally. I would lie under my blanket praying for death from the pain. I would weep incessantly.

But they got better over time.

I’ve gotten clearer-headed. I tried delving into my emotions. That works. After wallowing in them, I’m less frightened of drowning in anxiety. I’m less self-conscious about saying or doing or being stupid while I’m in this state.

Lately I’ve started noticing my triggers. When I say lately, I mean literally yesterday when I read an article on the same.

My triggers are situations in which I have no idea what’s going to happen.

Like job interviews. I can read every website in the universe. But I have no idea who’s on the other side of those doors. I have no idea how anything will turn out.

I can prepare myself for a job interview but really it’s a lot like dating. I go in there and I just talk. There has to be chemistry. And I try to connect and try to understand whether I would fit into this family. And really these people become like family. I have a choice about who I work with. And I should make it a good one. All the prep in the world won’t tell you how to manufacture that chemistry.

And here I am trying so desperately yet again – why is my life marked by desperation? When it’s not that, it’s anger. When it’s not that, it’s despair. Or depression. Or frustration.

And I am trying so desperately now to control. To maximize chances of success. To win. Pushed even to give up who I am. For a trifle. But I can’t do that.

In fact from years with anxiety disorder, I know what panicking does to me.

Anxiety saps energy.

Anxiety makes me forget that God has a plan.

Anxiety makes me avoid situations that’ll help me grow.

Anxiety keeps me small and hunted.

Anxiety is my friend.

It tells me that this situation is new. And exciting. And that I should embrace it for what it is. Just as I should embrace me, with all my weirdness and fragility and strength.

I keep telling myself it’s all going to be fine. And it’s working.

I’m living life on my own terms and it’s fine if this experiment goes belly up. It’s fine if I never achieve anything in a worldly sense. I did what I thought was right in the face of nearly unbearable opposition. I bore it. I’ve borne a lot of things. I’m really strong Alhamdulillah (by God’s grace).

But I am also sensitive. And I will expect strong emotions in my life. And I know I’ll be fine.

I want to go outside and look at that beautiful blue sky again. And those pink trees outside my home. I could really stare at them for days.

Love and peace. Wassalam and Fee Amanillah,

The Happy (and okay) Muslimah

4 ways to deal with rejection

Islam, life, Screenwriting, , ,

Bismillah ir Rahman ir Raheem

Assalam alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatahu.

Peace, blessings and mercy of God be on you (in case you didn’t understand the odd assortment of consonants and vowels above).

Sigh.

Didn’t make the Quest.

There’s part of me that wonders what I did wrong.

And there’s a part of me that knows that I did everything I could and then some.

It’s a funny dichotomy, that. Feels almost schizophrenic. But it’s a good thing – if the outside world doesn’t validate my work, I’m learning to validate myself.

So what did I do in order?

1.       Misery loves company – but only for a while.

I spent a little time among other non-Quest participants on the Black Board. Some ate pie and wept. My poison was blueberry streusel muffins.

These are blasted good. And if you want to offset the delayed gratification of screenwriting with some immediate gratification – there’s nothing like baking.

And eating.

Alhamdulillah (thank God) for muffins.

2.       Congratulate myself on how far I’ve come.

I looked back in horror at the absolute nonsense I sent to Scott last year LOL.

I really have learned a lot. Much more to learn, for sure. But I’ve definitely made great strides by the grace of God.

3.       Make a big goal (thank you Shaula Evans, mod of the Black Board, for this one).

I need to hit the ground running.

That means having at least one feature script on the Black Board by March next year and a total of 4 completed screenplays by then too – well at least three worth talking about. The first one, like my first attempt at the Quest, is rather embarrassing.

I’d also like to get one of my shorts made – either by myself or someone else. A couple of people are interested in some of my short screenplays. I’m going to ride that wave plus explore other beaches.

I really like beating these metaphors to death, huh?

I’m currently rewriting my second feature. Structure is my main focus with this draft. One mouthful of that elephant at a time.

 

We got two new cork boards at the thrift store and a garage sale for two more projects.

Why would people give away cork boards? Don’t they know they’re gold? In any case, Alhamdulillah for thrift stores and garage sales.

4.       Back to work.

It’s funny being my own boss. I don’t know how to reward myself. Whether to reprimand or pat myself on the back. I do alright most days.

Though alright is definitely not good enough.

And I’m noticing I have resistance over certain projects, mostly because of fear of rejection. Those are the ones I need to ride myself about.

Yes, it helps being a bit schizo when you’re an as-yet unproduced screenwriter.

You don’t need to be a writer to face rejection.

Please share anything you’ve learned on your way to greatness in your field. How to roll with the punches.

Watching Rocky might be a good idea right now.

Much love, lovelies.

Wassalam and Fee Amanillah (More peace and go with God)

Sabina.