Tag Archives: rejection

4 ways to deal with rejection

Bismillah ir Rahman ir Raheem

Assalam alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatahu.

Peace, blessings and mercy of God be on you (in case you didn’t understand the odd assortment of consonants and vowels above).


Didn’t make the Quest.

There’s part of me that wonders what I did wrong.

And there’s a part of me that knows that I did everything I could and then some.

It’s a funny dichotomy, that. Feels almost schizophrenic. But it’s a good thing – if the outside world doesn’t validate my work, I’m learning to validate myself.

So what did I do in order?

1.       Misery loves company – but only for a while.

I spent a little time among other non-Quest participants on the Black Board. Some ate pie and wept. My poison was blueberry streusel muffins.

Blueberry streusel muffins

These are blasted good. And if you want to offset the delayed gratification of screenwriting with some immediate gratification – there’s nothing like baking.

And eating.

Alhamdulillah (thank God) for muffins.

2.       Congratulate myself on how far I’ve come.

I looked back in horror at the absolute nonsense I sent to Scott last year LOL.

I really have learned a lot. Much more to learn, for sure. But I’ve definitely made great strides by the grace of God.

3.       Make a big goal (thank you Shaula Evans, mod of the Black Board, for this one).

I need to hit the ground running.

That means having at least one feature script on the Black Board by March next year and a total of 4 completed screenplays by then too – well at least three worth talking about. The first one, like my first attempt at the Quest, is rather embarrassing.

I’d also like to get one of my shorts made – either by myself or someone else. A couple of people are interested in some of my short screenplays. I’m going to ride that wave plus explore other beaches.

I really like beating these metaphors to death, huh?

I’m currently rewriting my second feature. Structure is my main focus with this draft. One mouthful of that elephant at a time.


We got two new cork boards at the thrift store and a garage sale for two more projects.

Why would people give away cork boards? Don’t they know they’re gold? In any case, Alhamdulillah for thrift stores and garage sales.

4.       Back to work.

It’s funny being my own boss. I don’t know how to reward myself. Whether to reprimand or pat myself on the back. I do alright most days.

Though alright is definitely not good enough.

And I’m noticing I have resistance over certain projects, mostly because of fear of rejection. Those are the ones I need to ride myself about.

Yes, it helps being a bit schizo when you’re an as-yet unproduced screenwriter.

You don’t need to be a writer to face rejection.

Please share anything you’ve learned on your way to greatness in your field. How to roll with the punches.

Watching Rocky might be a good idea right now.

Much love, lovelies.

Wassalam and Fee Amanillah (More peace and go with God)


The root of all evil

Bismillah ir Rahman ir Raheem

Assalam alaikum wr wb,

I hate money.

I hate it because I want it and need it so badly.

Money buys things I couldn’t possibly get otherwise. Money causes decades-long rifts between family members. Money buys freedom and education. Money enslaves everyone.

But let’s not get metaphysical. Let’s get real. What is this blog post really about?

Simply put – I need a job. I don’t need a job. I’m skiving off my dear husband’s brilliance. I actually want a job. I feel like a waste of space and a waste of a college education.

Sure, I’m screenwriting. But I am wondering in real terms how much I’m benefiting people in this here initial stages between dream and cinematic dream.

I’m talking to people online. I’m making connections and giving support. I’m putting my energy into writing the very best screenplay I can, but I’m letting go of the outcome anyway. It’s okay if it’s horrible.  I’ll even be happy if it is, because a) I’ll know that I have the humility and the brains enough to recognize when something is bad and b) learning is fun.

It’s better than doing. Doing is terrifying.

This is why job applications are terrifying.

It’s the judgment thing. As someone recovering from social anxiety, the thought of a job interview is terrifying.

This is perhaps the only reason why I don’t want to apply for jobs. I don’t want to be judged and found wanting. I guess because I already find myself wanting. I would not like to have that opinion confirmed.

But this is part of being an adult. Being rejected. Over. And over. And over. Again. This part of life. This is part of my learning curve for failure.

This is part of faking it till I become it.

I care about the work I do, even if it isn’t screenwriting. I care about telling a good story, writing a good article, doing better than I did before.

That’s why it doesn’t work, it hurts so very bad.

I don’t think this is about money at all. I’ve written a couple of screenplays and am getting very excited about the feature I’m working on. But I’ve done nothing for money in the past 10 months.

That statement is sitting now in my chest and in my gut. With no emotional charge around it at all.

I feel fine about that.

Why then do I want a job? Why then do I need a job?

  1. Getting a salary or getting paid, like it or not, is a great psychological security blanket. It can only make my writing better.
  2. In this peculiar world economy, all our futures are uncertain. I want to be able to have an income if we find ourselves in a crisis.
  3. Working challenged me to think outside my own box. I met some weird and wonderful people and found I had a taste for weird and wonderful things. Educational and youth activism. Women’s rights. Art as emotional release. God knows what I’ll discover while doing my next job.
  4. If I’m not contributing to humanity, I am quite right in thinking myself useless. I want to give back to my community with my skills.

Is that reason enough? I think it is.

God’s love, peace and protection with you.

The Happy (and constantly searching) Muslimah

P.S. Happy birthday to me. I’m 26 today. Now to find a job. If you know anyone who needs an online writer, I’m your woman!